*waves from behind the sofa*
I'm feeling fragile. I've had a selection of random head glitches sparked by some rubbishy life events and have disappeared into a hole again, but this is me poking my twitchy head out into the light and just reaffirming that I'm NOT gonna get smacked in the face with a shovel!
Are we all ok? I hope you've had an EPIC couple of weeks because you know you deserve the best of all shiny splendidness, like magic calorie-burning cupcakes, and great hair days, and a visit from tap-dancing, glittered cats, or Hugh Jackman .......(gimme a minute................ok -) yeah - all kinds of awesome! Spring seems to be edging its way through the biting frost-coated winter drapes that have blanketed the world for what seems like an eternity....little delicate flowers appearing, strong and fragile at the same time. That's kinda how I feel - who knew I'd be a snowdrop?!
I've had a LOT of journal time....a LOT..... It's the kind of journaling that I reserve for the 'special' books - the ones on the (cue spooky music) daaarrrk shelves..... Here's my journaling tip for anyone who experiences grotty dark patches and breaks in reality..... keep a selection of journals JUST for these times. Experience has taught me that if I inflict negativity on my regular daily journals/art journals that they become somewhat oppressive to me and in turn that affects my mood when I return once the darkness has passed. I have everyday books for everyday thoughts and emotions, sad books for sad days and angry books for angry rants and crazy painting. And I find that it's ok. I ALLOW myself to be angry or sad; I don't deny it. It needs to escape and get itself the hell away from me so that I can be happy again. Keeping these journals separate and specific helps me to clarify my feelings and find that release. They're no longer a bad reminder or oppressive judge, rather they're a support network of familiar and safe book friends that listen and forgive. I don't feel compelled to destroy them, rather I feel more secure knowing that they're there when I need them. I keep them apart from the rest - they don't mind, they're understanding that way and I can ignore them until I need them again.
I can't share - or rather I choose not to share these [dark] journal entries and art this time around. Everything's still a bit raw and also it's a bit grim and let's face it, none of us need more grim.......instead, just keep thinking 'Hugh Jackman, Hugh Jackman'...... (gimme another minute....... *sigh*)
This time around I found that I needed quick arty fixes to help me stepping-stone my brain back into the light. These I CAN share with you 'cos they're WAY less freaky...
I grabbed a couple of old sketchbooks and just played....drew things that made me happy - my go-to subjects: mermaids, kitties, fairies, flowers, seaside-related stuff... I found it hard to begin with, but I followed my own 'muse taming' techniques and coaxed that pesky musey minx into some happy arty activity, reluctant though she was at first. I find that these techniques help me loosen up, reduce that pressure to perform.
Catching up a little further - the sad loss of Leonard Nimoy (I'm a massive fan) prompted some journal doodles, which echoes what I said about using special days and moments as an incentive and guide for a journal entry - they're markers in time and something that I'm always glad of recording when I look back at past journals and sketchbooks:
I honestly don't care whether these are accurate or perfect... these are my personal journal pages - they don't HAVE to be perfect. LESS pressure - there's so much stress in life, our journals and our art are supposed to be a positive light in our lives. We don't HAVE to be the same as someone else....we don't HAVE to be 'on trend'... we don't HAVE to follow the competitive fashions and fads.....we can just be happy and creative.
Art is truly in the eye of the beholder so when you look at your work, know that it is a reflection of something unique and beautiful within you. And the more you doodle and scribble and play, the stronger you will become with techniques and skills and tricks of the trade. A line on a page doesn't exist 'til you draw it. What you draw and paint is born because you WANT to make a mark on the world - and what could be more beautiful? Love what you create. Nurture it. Be a proud parent to your art and in return it will reflect the coloured facets of your soul like a mirror ball - (and don't we all need a little disco beat to groove to?)
I'm feeling better for having completed this post. Thank you for putting up with my rambling AGAIN! I'm so late with my planned posts now that catching up is the blogging equivalent of jogging through treacle, so I'm going to re-think and re-jig the stacked up backlog and move on with less of that pressure. I annoy the crap outta myself when I realise that I'm adding my own stress....it's just stoopid! I'll see you soon and in the meantime - be friends with your art, and hug your books and journals and arty supplies and be kind to yourself.
Big smooshy cuddles from Shroo :) xxx